Friday, October 9, 2009

Apparently it's EVERYONE'S Business!

Mike and I had some errands to run today and had a few funny/irritating encounters and those reminded me of a few more i have had over the past few weeks, so i thought i would share.


1. I had my first "You Look Like You're About To Pop" encounter about 2 weeks ago. Mike and I were at Home Depot, it was near the end of the shopping day and i was getting pretty worn out and i am sure that my pain was written all over my face. Anyway, i am standing in the middle of an aisle, holding random home improvement stuff in my arms waiting for Mike to come back when i notice this elderly lady smiling brightly at me from about 20 feet away. Next thing i know she is right in front of me with her hand on my belly and wants says, "you must be due any time now". Being this seemed to be a nice old lady, i did my best to smile and not respond the way i really wanted, and simply told her that in fact i was not due to give birth until Christmastime and that I was having twins. Then, though i didn't think it was even possible, her smile got even bigger and she flat out hugged me in the middle of the aisle to congratulate me and then wanted to know all the details.

2. The same day, Mike and I were in Target and it was super busy in the baby section as is the case most of the time. There was this lady with her 27 children all running around her cart (okay, maybe it was just 4, but whatever my patience wears thin these days). She was holding a registry print out obviously trying to find the items on the list and she even had enlisted the help of an employee. Mike and I had tried our best to skillfully dodge this family a few times. But then before i could waddle myself out of the way, the employee followed by half the lady's kids are on our aisle and I look down to the end and see the lady with her big shopping cart and the rest of her kids are coming my way. There's nowhere for me to go so I back myself up as best i can--i am literally pressed against the shelves-- and instead of leaving her cart to the side and just walking by me, she is trying to squeeze her cart through the space left. Then if i didn't think this was going to get any worse she stops, literally with her cart right in front of me actually pressing against my belly like she just noticed i was there, she reaches out, pats my stomach and says, "hey honey, you gotta watch that belly". Flabbergasted, with her inches from my face, i asked her what exactly she thinks i should DO with it, it's not like i can suck it in". She just chuckles, replies "well of course not" and shoves herself on through. I am left stunned standing in the middle of the aisle wondering, did that really just happen?

3. Today, Mike and I were coming out of the commissary to go to our car. If you have not had the commissary experience, there are separate people who bag and carry your groceries to your car for you. They are not employees of the commissary, they just work for the tips. So, anyway this is a small installation with a very small parking lot, Mike has run ahead to get the car open and i am standing back with our bagger and groceries waiting for a car to pull out of its spot so we can get by. It's hot and I am tired and this car isn't moving... so, impatiently, i squeeze around it and hear someone yelling, i look over and discover the reason this driver has stopped in mid pull-out-- to roll down her window and obnoxiously yell out her window " wow! your about ready to pop". Seriously?

4. And i will leave you with this one, but i would first like to point out that i love my church family and am not implying anything mean, i just think this is super funny. So apparently, being pregnant has given permission to the sweet and caring church women to talk to me while i am trying to go to the bathroom. Some follow me in, some talk to me while i am standing in the stall trying to shut the door the whole time silently praying i won't pee all over myself before i can get their questions answered, and then some just keep talking away while i am actually USING the bathroom. I'll be the first to admit, i have had a few talks over the stall with a friend, but usually this happens when the bathroom is empty and it's a pretty close friend. I must have missed the part in my What to Expect While You Are Expecting book that says all bathroom etiquette and privacy is invalid for the remainder of my gestation period.


Kimberly and Jordan said...

Funny stories...I thought the picture was you and I was thinking 'No she didn't!!!'. Halloween ideas with the bump could be fun though. Haha.

tetterm said...

i really like the old lady story. i can't wait to see your nursery. what color was the glider that you got?

Lyndsay said...

oh my goodness! How annoying! I had a few weird situations myself but nothing like yours. If I were you I would just tell them whats on your mind when they do stuff like that.Not everyone likes to be touched by complete strangers. Look at the bright side at least you have some stories to share years from now to the kids when you are telling them what you went through to have them (-: