It's been two months and three days since Mike left. I said it last month, and i'm gonna have to say it again, but its been another long month. We're still living moment to moment--i just put one foot in front of the other, tell myself to breathe, get the task done, breathe again and move forward. It's all I can do right now.
We've been super busy. I guess September is a busy time for everyone. Everything has started back--school, dance, awana, mops, bible study, and story time. We've had vacation, birthdays, and play dates. The weather has been gorgeous and i'm trying to take them out and enjoy it as much as i can. I don't think we've had a day this month that we haven't had something to do. Sometimes being busy can be a bit overwhelming for us, but right now it's more of a coping mechanism. Staying busy keeps our mind off of Daddy not being here. For now, that's what I need.
I'm happy to report, there have been much fewer tears all around. We are adjusting to life without Mike and finding our new rhythm. The kids still ask about him often--Nora more than Holden. Nora is still obsessed with people leaving. You can tell she's trying to make sense of it all--there are still some nights she goes to bed sad and talking about her Daddy. I understand. There's days i go to bed sad too. What else can i say, but that "i miss him too" and "it's okay, we'll get thru it"? Holden doesn't say much about it anymore. This month he told me that he didn't want to sleep with his daddy doll, when i asked why, he said "i love my daddy, but i don't love my daddy doll". I had to laugh. He can be such a serious little guy,
We have been talking to Mike pretty regularly still. I'm so thankful for skype. I'm also thankful for a husband who will wake up at any time of night to talk to his family when it's convenient for us. We probably call him at 3-4 am, his time, most days. He always wakes right up and has a smile on his face, ready to hear whatever his littles want to tell him. He's a good daddy--even from halfway around the world.
So 2 months down, 7 to go. We just gotta keep going.
Mail from Daddy
another sweet surprise mail for us from Auntie Kim
Davis' last night before he turning one.